A relationship breakup is never easy. Maybe it hit you out of the blue, or you saw it coming, but the pain of a broken heart can take its toll.
How can you heal from a breakup and glue the pieces of your broken heart back together?
No matter what do not go for a Rebound!
You might have locked yourself away; you are not going out, all you are doing is crying, eating ice-cream and looking at pictures of your Ex. Your friends suggest to come out and have a good time, maybe find someone you can have fun with. Here is the thing a Rebounce or meaningless sex to heal your broken heart makes it even more difficult. You actually hurt your soul, plus the person you have a Rebounce with might develop genuine feelings for you.
You are grieving!
Even if your partner has not died, you are grieving; you are experiencing a loss. Very often we are thinking about the plans we had for our future together with our partner. We have to come to terms that those plans will never take place. You have to wave goodbye to them. Give yourself time to grieve.
Acknowledge also the bad times!
This is very important especially when you did not want to split up and wanted to stay in the relationship. Understand that there are not only good times, but there were also things that annoyed you and times you are glad about to wave goodbye to. Really make an effort to highlight those annoying things too.
What to do if you want your Ex back?
Yep, some of us might think that the only way to heal our broken heart is to get our Ex back. We maybe try to mold into the person we think the Ex wants, we might text, beg them to come back, change into something we are not. Here is the thing, and I know there are a lot of myths going around on how to get your Ex back. But your Ex is your Ex for a reason! No matter what, DO NOT change into a different person only to get them back. Tons of begging messages or I miss you texts, or I have changed messages won’t help. Making them jealous, won’t help either. Let them go; they made the decision, so give them space. And do me one favor, please do not message it all over Social Media, you will regret it later.
Be authentic and be loved for who you are.
Relationship breakups are actually helping us to understand who we are. It raises self-awareness. Of course, it hurts, no one wants to deal with a broken heart. But understand that your self-worth should never be attached to a person. Relationships help us grow into the person we really are. In being yourself, you will automatically attract people into your life that should be there. Very often we believe when we enter a relationship that we have to compromise the person who we are. Learn to love yourself, understand that when someone breaks up with you that it does not automatically mean that you are not loveable. If you have compromised your authenticity to be in this relationship, then that is the reason why it breaks down.
Cut out toxic people.
With relationship breakups, we also will automatically find out who our true friends are. Very often we have the same circle of friends as our Ex. Understand that some of those friends might wave goodbye to you too.
But there are also toxic people that get highlighted. So-called friends who keep you updated about what your Ex-partner is currently doing or who they are currently seeing. Or they might tell you that they knew way before you knew it that they would break up with you. You need to get rid of those people, they are toxic and will delay your healing process.
Overall give yourself time. Yes, of course, it hurts, and no you will not end up with hundreds of cats and cardigans and living alone somewhere (only if this is what you really want 😉 ). Of course, you are loveable, and amongst 7 billion people on this beautiful planet, there will be definitely someone who will choose you and love you for who you are.
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Article written by Jennifer White of Strong Heart Awakening. Jennifer White Ad. Dip. Psych. is a global human potential thought leader, blogger, Psychological Therapist with CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) skills, Life Coach and Public and Motivational Speaker. Jennifer White has experience in counseling and coaching people with substance misuse, anxiety and depression. She is currently working as a self-employed Psychological Therapist and Life Coach in her practice, helping people reaching their real potential. Jenny holds public and motivational speeches and shared her ideas with other speakers on the stage of the Celebrate Your Life event in Arizona 2016. She runs successfully her self-development and self-help groups on- and offline.
©Love Wide Open