4 Tips To Make A Relationship Last

Now that you’ve found a happily-ever-after, that one perfect person for you, you’ve probably developed comfy habits that most days cause you to feel safe and content.  At other times perhaps, the cozy life may feel a bit monotonous.  How do you clear away the doldrums and breathe some fresh air into this stagnant state of affairs?  Let’s take a look at 4 parts of your relationship that may need consideration and what will really make a relationship last.

Communication

Communication is the key to everything.  This is true of all aspects of life, but especially in a romantic partnership.  You may not even realize the two of you hardly talk anymore.  Here’s an example, do you find that you ask how their day was, just to get credit for asking?  How often is their answer simply “fine” or “good”?  Try this instead, next time say, “Tell me about your day”.  You’re more likely to hear details of your partner’s day, not just a one-word answer.   Listen closely and the next day follow up on part of the story from the day before.  It’s easy to fall into a routine of poor exchanges, so in the beginning, it will take awareness on your part to try to change these behaviors, but in time you will find a new pattern of communication that is far more rewarding.

Attraction

We’ve all heard of ways to spice up passion in the bedroom, but while passion is important, attraction is more significant to a long term relationship.  The problem is that we all have busy lives and fall into bad habits.  You may notice a conversation with your partner in which you barely look away from the TV, or computer, or meal you’re eating.  Try holding their gaze for at least 15 seconds whenever you are together.  Looking into the eyes of a loved one has a calming effect that is not only good for your health but will remind you of the attraction you feel for one another.

Compassion

Your partner’s problems are your problems.  That’s what a partnership is about.  It’s not your job to fix every problem that arises, but you do need to show empathy and understanding for whatever circumstance they are dealing with.  Showing compassion is much more about listening than talking.  If there is no clear solution or your partner isn’t ready for you to suggest a solution, simply acknowledge that what they are experiencing is difficult, would be difficult for anyone, and you’re available to them for whatever they may need.

Attentiveness

Have you ever met a dog that didn’t get up to greet its owner at the door when they arrived home?  Probably not.  The reason you feel like you are everything to your dog is that your dog shows you attention whenever you are around.  The same should be true of your relationship.  Your partner and partnership should be the top priority in your life above all else.  Often this means you need to stop what you are doing to give your partner your full attention.

When we first fall in love we enthusiastically try to learn about the other person’s interests, history, and ambitions, but as time goes on we fall into the habit of thinking we know all there is to know about our love and any new knowledge is acquired passively.  We are constantly evolving, growing and maturing as we go through our lives, don’t forget that your partner is too.  It’s important to continue to actively seek out any new changes in your love.

By practicing open communication, renewing your attraction, showing compassion and attentiveness, you will be more engaged in your partner’s life and your partner will feel appreciated.  Devote yourself to making sure your partner not only knows they are loved but feels that love every day.

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