When you think about romantic love and what is the most important aspect of creating a healthy and long-lasting partnership, what would you think of? Love, respect, honesty, and trust are just a few that come to mind. All of these are important elements of a happy relationship. There is one element, however, which binds the rest together and that is communication. Without communication, love cannot be expressed or interpreted. Honesty, trust, respect do not matter if it cannot be communicated.
Communication is so much more than words. Gestures, body language, good deeds, the interaction of the physical self, are all examples of nonverbal forms of communication. Science and psychology reveal that different personality types communicate differently. The way you communicate might be entirely different than the way your spouse communicates. That explains a lot. So what can you do to break down the communication barriers to better communicate with your spouse?
Here Are 5 Tips for Better Communication With Your Spouse:
Understand How Your Spouse Takes In Love— Love is an innate human need. We all need to experience love to a certain degree in order to be healthy happy individuals. Unfortunately, we all take in love a little different. For example, you may take in love through physical contact while your spouse may take in love verbally. The key here is to discover how your spouse needs to be loved and then offer that to them.
Take the Time to Observe Your Spouse’s Needs—Similarly, it is important to be aware of your partner’s needs. What is going on within your spouses head? Put yourself in their shoes. Is your partner overwhelmed with housework or child care? Help them with laundry. Take the kids out and give your partner some alone time! Is your spouse working a lot of hours? Why not make a nice dinner followed by a foot rub. Once you are able to identify the needs of your spouse; you will be able to offer them what they need. That is perhaps the most meaningful form of communication. People think communicating is between people, however, sometimes our spouses communicate to us and we don’t realize it. Try and pay attention to circumstance and needs as a new form of communication.
Use Gestures Rather Than Words to Express How You Feel—I love yous only go so far, especially if your partner takes love in physically. Sometimes a nice gesture speaks louder than words. Consider waking your spouse up with breakfast in bed to show them how much you care about them. To love and to be loved are two separate entities. Giving and sharing love is the single most important means of communication between you and your partner. If you cannot communicate the love between you, then you have a destination with no vehicle. You lose purpose and eventually the love may cease if it has no place to go or if it is not fueled by your loved one.
Spend Time Together Doing Meaningful Activities—Taking the time to nurture and care for your relationship is extremely important in the communication process. Being in each other’s presence, spending soul time together is one of the best ways to communicate love with your spouse. Maintaining a healthy friendship with your partner will bring you through many years of hardship.
Don’t Shy Away From an Argument or Bottle Up Your Negative Feelings Towards Your Partner—There’s an old saying, “bitterness is an acid that will dissolve the container in which it is stored.” Uncommunicated bitterness will destroy your relationship faster than anything. If you choose to bottle it up inside, you choose to destroy yourself and the love between you and your partner. A bitter person cannot love. Instead, let go of the anger. Tell your spouse you are upset. Fight if you have to, but get it out in the open. Give it back to the world. Once it’s out of your presence, it can latch on to your spirit. If you let it go, it will eventually fly away.
By letting go, you open your heart space to more important aspects of love, such as forgiveness and gratitude. Without the communication, the process of letting go becomes impossible and even destructive. Above all, remember not just to love, but to open your heart space and communicate and share the love too. ❤️
Check out How to Pick Up the Pieces After an Emotional Disagreement With Your Spouse for more information on communication with your spouse.
©Love Wide Open