There are reasons why you should be careful pushing away your emotions. Emotions are not pointless regardless of what you have been told. In fact, more often than you even realize, your emotions have guided you through your life. They’ve helped you cope with difficult, sometimes debilitating situations. The emotions are not what is making you weak, but the inability to properly dispose and deal with them is.
In fact, emotions can be empowering. Consider this quote from Washington Irving:
“There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are the messengers of overwhelming grief, of deep contrition, and of unspeakable love.”
The bad occurs when you refuse to listen to what your feelings are trying to say and instead push them away, or even worse pretend they never existed in the first place. Sound familiar? If you are the type to push your feelings away, keep reading. This could happen to you:
This could happen to you if you keep pushing away your emotions:
If you ignore your emotions, all the stress and emotion that does exist does not go away just because you pretend that it’s not there. Sometimes the energy transforms and becomes manifested physically into illness, moodiness, depression, or sleep deprivation. Research reveals that emotional stress or trauma absolutely can affect the nervous system. It can also cause reckless or impulsive behavior and could result in addiction, such as nicotine use or alcohol and drug addictions.
The Inability to Cope With Traumatic Life Experiences
The number one item an employer looks for on a resume is experience. When you push away all the opportunities in the world to gain experience, you are less likely to find employment later on in life. You will be less prepared to deal with what’s down the pipeline and the employer knows that.
If you never allow yourself the experience of accepting and dealing with certain emotions, when bad things happen, such as the death of loved ones, you have no means of coping because you are not experienced in doing so. By refusing to deal with your emotions on a day to day basis, you are actually impairing yourself more.
Loss of Real Love and Happiness
Your emotions are not a faucet that can be turned on and off at will. If you are refusing to deal with the bad ones then there is no way to be completely in touch with the good ones. As a result, your family, spouse, and loved ones might find you emotionally unavailable. That means you are pushing them away. One of these days they might not find their way back. Everyone requires a certain amount of emotional intimacy, some more than others. Your spouse may require much more emotional intimacy and if you are not prepared to give it, they may end up retaining it with someone else.
That said, it is also important to distinguish the difference between dealing with emotions and dwelling on them. The time comes when the emotions, especially the negative ones, must be let go of. Not ignored, but acknowledged and let go of. The first step of defending against an attack is by acknowledging that the threat exists in the first place.
Keep in mind too, that any time you suppress something, you run the risk of being overrun by the very thing you are cutting out of your life. Don’t let this be you. Open your heart space to all feelings, no matter how uncomfortable they may seem at the time. It might not be easy, but we promise you this: it will be worth it.
©Love Wide Open