When You Know It’s Time To Let Go of Love
Do you need to let go of love? There are moments in life when you feel empty or depleted. Mornings when you wake up and wish you didn’t. Not because you hate life, but because you can’t stand the thought of doing another dish, sweeping another floor, cooking another meal. You’ve put the happiness of others before you for so long that you don’t even know who “you” are anymore.
We find moments in life when we get lost and forget to love ourselves. Perhaps you lost yourself in a messy relationship? Perhaps a good relationship went bad because you stopped loving, stopped caring?
Sometimes it is necessary to give up the things that you love the most in order to love yourself. Think about it. Alcoholics love to drink, but they must choose to love themselves more in order to give it up. This is precisely why addiction takes lives. It’s hard to give up what we love the most. Now brace yourself, because this is a hard truth to hear and an even harder one to accept: in order to reach true love, it is necessary to give up the things you love the most.
Here are five questions to find out if you need to let go of love and love yourself more.
Do you sacrifice your happiness?
This one is likely familiar to most parents. Of course, we want our children and spouses to be happy. But, to what extent should your happiness be sacrificed? If you have had to sacrifice your own happiness in order to make someone else happy, something has gone wrong. Families should take care of each other.
Fun in the sun for all but one is not a good way to live.
You can’t completely blame them if you’re not happy. Why? Because happiness comes from within. It comes from your decision to put yourself first and be happy. Once that happens, then you can help your loved ones do the same.
When we are sad and lonely, that’s a cry out from within ourselves to be loved by ourselves. No one else can fill that void. First, you must understand that you are in charge of your own happiness. If you are feeling unhappy, only you can fix it.
Do you feel like you’re acting the role of someone you’re not?
Have you gotten to a point where you don’t even know who you are anymore? Do you feel lost or like you’re living a lie? These are dangerous emotions to be feeling, my friends. When you spend all your time pleasing others at the sacrifice of yourself, you will at some point lose your identity. That means you are allowing yourself to be defined by others. That leaves you in a vulnerable position. It is your right to take back your identity. It is within your power to let go of others’ expectations of you and do what makes you happy. Someone who deeply loves and cares about you will encourage this change.
Have you become someone you’re not?
This is similar to the last question but slightly different. If you have become someone that is not who you intended to be. If you have become a not so good person because of the influence of others, it might be time to let go of those people. God forbid you to wake up one day and realize you don’t like the person you are. Sometimes parents have to tell their children they cannot hang out with certain friends because they always get into trouble. This is exactly why you must let go of some people. Different people open up on different roads to different futures. If you realize you went down the wrong road and have become someone you should never have become, then it’s time to let go of the life you have and open up opportunities for a new one.
What are you afraid of?
If you know deep down that it’s time to leave something or someone behind, but you haven’t out of fear or anxiety, ask yourself what are you afraid of? Your choices should never be based on fear. That’s a red flag that you’re allowing your decisions to be made by another person. This is an unhealthy codependent lifestyle and, believe it or not, one of the most common reasons for not letting go of people or things in your life that you’d be better off without. There is always something to fear in every situation. Quitting smoking is scary, but it doesn’t mean you shouldn’t do it. Whatever you chose in your life should be a healthy happy choice for you. Anything that you do that opposes self-love should be let go of.
Have you lost your self-worth?
When you constantly put a person before you, you are telling yourself and that other person that you’re not worth as much as they are. Sharing your life with someone is a beautiful thing, but spending your entire life putting yourself down to serve another—even if it started by your own choice—is no way to live. It’s never too late to stop this behavior and let go of this thinking. You might be surprised at how much better off your relationships are. If your partner loves you like they say they do, they will be happy with your decision to put yourself first. You deserve love, so stop refusing to allow yourself to have it.
There’s only one person in this world who can love you 100% and that’s the person that knows you the best–YOU! It’s not easy, but with a lot of work and self-care, you can let go of this thinking. You will have to make sacrifices. Sometimes you must let go of things in life and people you love, even long-term relationships and marriages. It’s important to know when to let go of things you love if they are harmful to you. After all, when you let go of one thing, heart space becomes available for a brighter future. It may just be time to let go of love to see what comes back.
Thanks for tuning in. Comment below and tell us your stories of letting go of the things you loved the most.
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©2017 Love Wide Open
Thank you for your feedback.
Very important update! Things have changed and I have both my son and daughter back in my life and I am very happy about this.
Lissy , did they get straightened out. Because I have the exact same situation to the t. I am in the process right now. My son just moved out and we still have a good relationship but my daughter is just about to do me in and I can’t handle it anymore. I feel bad about the way I feel but I just want MY life , my husband passed 6 years ago and it is time for me to be happy again.