Self-care can be difficult. But what does actually happen when we finally put ourselves first on our list?
1. People will test your boundaries:
Yes, this will happen, people might expect from you that you put them still first. They will try it and might wonder what has happened? Good and nurturing people in your life will applaud you. Toxic people will reveal themselves; they might try to emotionally blackmail you in any form or way to make you feel guilty that you finally address your own needs.
2. You start to get healthier:
Because you put yourself first, you might have made a list of the things you want to do, which means you start nourishing your soul. Do not be surprised when your stiff neck or headaches are going away, or you sleep better. You might even eat healthier because you are not as stressed anymore. When you think about it, not only do you have no time left for yourself, but you also have more “creative space” in your head left.
3. Your circle of friends will change:
For some of us that might be a dramatic change, especially when we had a lot of people around us that were toxic and who put themselves always first on our list. You now very likely surround yourself with people that respect you, because you are setting your boundaries a lot better and take self-care more seriously. With this, you will automatically filter out any negative people or so-called energy-vampires.
4. You might even change your job:
If your job had a lot to do with your lack of self-care you very likely will go out and find a better and more suitable job for you. Maybe you were the only one that has done over time and additional projects no one wanted to do. Or you were the one who never asked for a pay rise and got overlooked every time even though you worked your butt off. It is very likely when we were used not to put ourselves first that we find a job that just pays the bills. I sometimes wonder how many artists are sitting in an office and are hurting their souls on a daily basis because they feel it is too selfish to live their dream.
5. You start following your goals and dreams again:
When we take our self-care seriously, our dreams appear again. This happens because you are not running around for other people or solving other people’s problems. So you have space to find out what YOU want in life. You are more relaxed, and with this, your creative energy will flow easier. I experienced this myself. When I started to put myself first, I finally started setting goals for myself again and began to remember my dreams that got buried underneath everyone else that I placed first on my list.
6. You start to understand that putting yourself first benefits EVERYONE:
You know when you started to put yourself first, you felt guilty? Maybe you felt that everyone is judging you or it might have been even the case. But now you see what benefit it brings. Because when you are happier the people around can feel this energy too. You inspire others to do the same. Think about it! When you are low and exhausted, you cannot concentrate very well; you might even be grumpy, irritated, angry, depressed. Any energy we put out rubs off on other people too. It can rub off on your loved ones and the ones you are working with. Plus you will push away possible promotions, friends; you can lose even your partner.
Putting yourself first is an essential part of growing, and of nourishing not only your soul but also the people you love. It is NOT selfish. I wish for you that you start today and put yourself first on your list. Let me know how it goes. 😉
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Article was written by Jennifer White of Strong Heart Awakening. Jennifer White Ad. Dip. Psych. is a global human potential thought leader, blogger, Psychological Therapist with CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) skills, Life Coach and Public and Motivational Speaker. Jennifer White has experience in counseling and coaching people with substance misuse, anxiety and depression. She is currently working as a self-employed Psychological Therapist and Life Coach in her practice, helping people reaching their real potential. Jenny holds public and motivational speeches and shared her ideas with other speakers on the stage of the Celebrate Your Life event in Arizona in 2016. She runs successfully her self-development and self-help groups on- and offline.
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